Relationships laced with unrealistic expectations will not last very long. Following are the five main expectations which will definitely turn a relationship into a recipe for a broken heart.
A college degree
There is no denying that education should always be your priority. It cannot be stressed enough as to how well-equipped you can be handle to life in an adult world when you have a college degree in your hand. With a proper education, you will have more doors opening for you as compared to someone who chose not to go to college.
So, it is only natural that you look for a partner who also has such qualifications to boast of. It will help both of you in a building a more secure and stable life together. With good job prospects, you will not have to face a financial crunch, hopefully.
But is a college degree something to throw away a good relationship over? What if you meet a guy whom you have hit it off with instantly, who works well enough to earn a decent living and is committed to you? Things are getting serious between you two but the fact that he isn’t a college graduate makes you unsure if that is the kind of person you want to spend your life with. Remember that education isn’t the only pre-requisite in forming a life-long relationship.
Passion, understanding, kindness, and loyalty are some of the other values that are vital to making a relationship work. There is no degree high enough or certificate when it comes to love.
You may have been brought up with particular religious affiliations by your parents in your household. They will pass down the religion that they follow to you and will teach you to practice and follow it as well. You are bound to family obligations as well as religious affiliations as they are passed down generation after generation.
When it comes to love and thoughts of settling down, you probably would choose to do so with someone who shares the same religious ideologies as you do. Marrying outside belief may very well be unheard of or forbidden where you come from. You also would have been indoctrinated to pick someone from the same belief.
But what if true love comes knocking down your door and he’s the kind of guy you’d always hoped to marry. He’s charming, affectionate and genuine in his feelings towards you. Marriage is on the table and you want to scream ‘Yes!’ with every fiber of your being. The only thing that’s stopping you is that he is not of the same faith.
Religion alone does not create happiness or strength in a relationship. What’s more important is to have common beliefs, interests and life values. Love is blind to race, religion, origin, gender, and age.
A huge bank account
There is no denying that having money can make things a lot easier. You will live the life you otherwise never would have been able to and a lot more opportunities will knock on your door. You will get to experience life without worrying about how much you have left in your bank account. But while money does make the world go round, it cannot buy and sustain happiness.
True happiness comes from within. When two people vow to uphold each other for richer or for poorer, they are truly united without materialistic aspirations from each other.
Love doesn’t cost a thing and when worst comes to worst, money will not be the glue to stick the relationship back together.
According to the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey your relationship can have a huge bank account of trust when:
- You listen to and pay attention to each other. Developing an understanding means to work with your partner instead of against them. A relationship is not a competition.
- Keep your promises to honor your partner and the relationship.
- Make little gestures to win over their heart.
- Be vocal about what you expect and don’t keep any unrealistic expectations of each other.
- Mistakes happen and we are all humans. Apologize sincerely and let them know that you are truly sorry.
- Always uphold the core values that both of you believe in and cherish.
A powerful last name
Who doesn’t want a privileged lifestyle but a social status might not be everything that you believe it to be. It will not guarantee a secure relationship and shouldn’t that be a priority anyway rather than a social status? Living a high status lifestyle will gain you the approval of your peers but when it comes to love approval needs to come from within.
Choosing a partner for romantic reasons rather than for societal ones will build a stronger and healthier relationship. The last name on your identity card amounts to nothing if you are unhappy and dissatisfied with how life turned out. Meeting and moving around in elite circles may attract you to the wrong person for all the wrong reasons.
A Marriage license
Marriage means commitment and commitment will lead to a lifelong relationship. But that only works if both the partners in the relationship share same values, beliefs and attitude towards life. They respect each other, build each other up and are always the other’s constant support. There is love and there is passion which brings them together to make a bond which will last for all eternity.
Even something as binding as marriage will not save a fickle relationship. If you are looking for marriage so that he would stay committed to you then you have got it the other way around. He is marrying you because he is committed to you. Marriage is a beautiful union of love and friendship which is made for better or for worse.